Combining IFS and DBT

8 C's in IFS

Merging Two Transformative Therapies for Deep Healing

Dialectical Behavior Therapy (DBT) is a rock star when it comes to helping people regulate emotions, improve relationships, and manage distress. 🌟💖 But sometimes, no matter how many DBT skills we master, deep emotional wounds still rear their heads, making it tough to actually use those skills.

Learn more about IFS Basics here

Enter Internal Family Systems (IFS). While DBT provides those all-important skills for calmer, kinder living, IFS helps heal the Parts of us that struggle to apply those skills in the first place. By blending DBT’s structured approach with IFS’s gentle, compassionate inner work, therapy becomes:

  • More effective at healing core emotional hurts
  • More sustainable (skills become second nature!)
  • More holistic, covering mind, emotions, and behaviors

Ready to see how DBT + IFS can work magic together? Let’s dive in! 🚀✨

Understanding DBT: The Four Core Skill Areas

Developed by Dr. Marsha Linehan, DBT combines cognitive-behavioral strategies with mindfulness techniques. It was originally for borderline personality disorder but now helps with anxiety, depression, trauma—you name it! 🌿💛

DBT is organized around four main skill areas:

1. Mindfulness: Staying Present and Aware 🧘‍♂️🌿

Mindfulness encourages us to:

  • Stay in the present rather than spiraling into overwhelming emotions
  • Observe thoughts without instantly believing them
  • Improve overall self-awareness

IFS Twist: IFS takes mindfulness a step further, teaching us to notice specific Parts (e.g., an anxious Part, an angry Part) without blending with them. So instead of just “I’m anxious,” it becomes “A Part of me is anxious—what does it want me to know?” 🌀🧐

What are Parts in IFS?

2. Distress Tolerance: Coping with Emotional Pain Without Making It Worse 🚦🔥

Distress tolerance is all about surviving emotional hurricanes without destructive coping (like self-harm or substance use). DBT gives skills like:

  • STOP: Stop, Take a step back, Observe, Proceed
  • TIPP: Temperature, Intense exercise, Paced breathing, Progressive relaxation

IFS Twist: Instead of just distracting yourself, IFS helps you ask, “Which Part of me is so overwhelmed, and what does it need?” This means soothing those overwhelmed Parts, not just dodging them. 🌧️💖

3. Emotion Regulation: Understanding and Managing Emotions 🌊🛠️

Emotion regulation in DBT helps with:

  • Labeling feelings correctly
  • Reducing emotional triggers
  • Boosting positive emotions (through healthy habits)

IFS Twist: DBT teaches how to shift your mindset to calm your emotions, while IFS digs into why certain emotions run so wild. Maybe an Exile is carrying big sadness from childhood, or a Protector is shouting to keep you safe. Identifying those Parts fosters genuine self-compassion. 🌼🪄

4. Interpersonal Effectiveness: Navigating Relationships with Confidence 💬💛

DBT’s interpersonal effectiveness skills help you:

  • Set boundaries (without guilt)
  • Ask for what you need (without fear)
  • Manage conflicts gracefully

IFS Twist: If a Part of you is terrified of rejection, you might ignore those new boundary-setting skills. By understanding that Part—what it fears, why it’s there—you can move from “I should be assertive” to “I can be assertive because my Part no longer feels so scared.” 💪🤗

What are Protectors in IFS?

How IFS Complements and Enhances DBT Techniques

1. Moving Beyond “Coping” to Deep Healing

DBT says: “Here’s how to tolerate distress without making things worse.”
IFS asks: “Can we heal the Part that’s creating all this distress?”

Instead of just coping, you can actually mend the deeper wound, so those intense emotions lose some of their power. ✨🌈

2. Preventing Skill “Drop-Off” by Addressing Resistance

Sometimes we know what we’re supposed to do, but a Part of us says, “Nope, too scary!” 😱

Example: A client learning to say “no” might have a Part terrified of disappointing people.

  • DBT would say: “Use the DEAR MAN skill to assert your needs.”
  • IFS goes, “Which Part fears letting someone down? Let’s reassure that Part.”

This approach helps you stick to those DBT tools long-term, because your Parts are on board! 🏅🥰

3. Transforming Self-Criticism with Self-Compassion

DBT style: “Challenge your self-critical thoughts.”
IFS style: “Talk to the Part that’s critical. What are its fears? Can we show it compassion so it doesn’t need to be so harsh?”

Result? Lasting kindness toward yourself—no more mind wars with your inner critic. 💖🤝

Case Study: Using DBT and IFS Together

Client: A 28-year-old woman with emotional ups and downs, big self-criticism, and tough relationship patterns.

  1. DBT Emotion Regulation: She learns to label her feelings and reduce knee-jerk reactions. 🎉
  2. IFS Work: She finds a self-critical Part shielding her from rejection.
  3. DBT Distress Tolerance + IFS Unburdening: She uses DBT skills to stay calm while gently exploring that Part’s pain.

Outcome:

  • Less critical self-talk
  • Stronger emotional coping
  • Improved, healthier relationships

By mixing DBT’s skillset with IFS’s deeper healing, she experiences real transformation from the inside out. 🌻💕

Learn more about Unburdening in IFS

Practical Strategies for Integrating IFS with DBT

  1. DBT Mindfulness + IFS Part Awareness
    • Notice when you’re “blended” with a big emotion.
    • Gently identify which Part is activated instead of labeling the entire self as “angry,” “sad,” etc.
  2. Distress Tolerance Before Deep IFS
    • Use DBT to calm your body and mind (like paced breathing).
    • Then explore your Parts through IFS, so you don’t get overwhelmed.
  3. IFS Self-Compassion + DBT Interpersonal Skills
    • Work with the Part that fears rejection before trying DBT’s communication tips.
    • This way, your requests and boundaries feel more authentic and less nerve-racking.
  4. Addressing DBT Skill Resistance with IFS
    • If a Part is sabotaging the use of a skill, sit down and chat with it.
    • Understand its worries, reassure it, and watch that sabotage melt away.

      Enhance Your IFS Journey with the IFS Guide App 📱✨

      The IFS Guide App offers 24/7 AI-guided IFS Sessions, Daily Check-Ins, adaptive Self-Healing Meditations, and Parts Mapping to visualize your Parts’ relationships. Additionally, you can join the In-App Community, explore guided Trailheads, set Reminders, and Track Parts to support your team’s shift toward Self-led leadership in real time.


      DOWNLOAD IFS GUIDE APP HERE👈

Final Thoughts: Why DBT and IFS Work So Well Together

  1. DBT hands you powerful tools to manage emotions and handle relationships.
  2. IFS helps you heal the Parts that block or distort using these tools.
  3. Together, they create a loving and empowering therapy experience—no more “fake it till you make it,” but genuine, heart-felt change. 🌟🦋

For folks battling emotional dysregulation, trauma, or that incessant inner critic, fusing DBT and IFS can be the dream team for lasting emotional balance. So why not blend the best of both worlds? 🌍💖

What do you think about combining DBT and IFS? Tried it? Curious to start? Let’s keep the conversation going!

Monthly IFS Workshops & Challenges!

Every month we organize online workshops to help you get a deeper understanding of IFS!

FAQ

A: DBT is a therapeutic approach that combines cognitive-behavioral techniques with mindfulness. It is designed to help individuals regulate emotions, improve relationships, and manage distress effectively.

A: The four core skill areas in DBT are Mindfulness, Distress Tolerance, Emotion Regulation, and Interpersonal Effectiveness, each focusing on specific aspects of emotional and interpersonal skills.

A: While DBT provides structured skills for managing acute emotional distress and improving interpersonal relationships, IFS offers methods for deeper emotional healing by addressing the underlying causes of emotional disturbances.

A: Yes, combining these therapies can enhance emotional regulation by providing DBT skills for immediate coping and IFS techniques for resolving deeper emotional conflicts that contribute to dysregulation.

A: The DBT skill of ‘Distress Tolerance’ can be enhanced by IFS by not only managing distress in the moment but also exploring and healing the parts of the self that are overwhelmed by emotional pain.

A: The IFS Guide App provides AI-guided IFS sessions, daily check-ins, self-healing meditations, parts mapping, and a community support system to help users engage with and understand their internal parts effectively.

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